BLONDE'S GUIDE TO MEDICAL TERMS...

Question: How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolatechip cookies?
Answer: You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.

Question: Why do blondes have see-through lunch box lids?
Answer: So they know if it is morning or afternoon.

Question: What’s black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling ?
Answer: A blond electrician

Question: What did the blonde say to the physicist?
Answer: “Why, I just _love_ nuclear fission! What do you use for bait?”

Question: What’s the difference between a blond and a shopping cart?
Answer: A shopping cart has a mind of it’s own.

Question: Why did the blonde scale the glass wall?
Answer: To see what was on the other side.

Question: How do you drive a blonde crazy?
Answer: Give her a bag of M&Ms and tell her to alphabetize them.

Question: What do you call two nuns and a blonde?
Answer: Two tight ends and a wide receiver.

Question: What’s the difference between a blonde and a guy?
Answer: The blonde has the higher sperm count.

Question: What’s a blonde’s favorite nursery rhyme?
Answer: Humpme Dumpme.

Question: Why do blondes tattoo their zipcode under their belly button?
Answer: So they can get the male into the right box.

Question: Why did the blonde keep ice cubes in the freezer?
Answer: So she could keep the refrigerator cold!

Question: What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?
Answer: An Air Bag

Question: What can strike a blonde without her even knowing it?
Answer: A thought.

Question: Why is a washing machine better than a blonde?
Answer: Because you can drop your load in a washing machine, and it won’t
follow you around for a week.

Q. Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
A. She kept throwing out the “W’s”.

Question: Why did the blonde stop using the pill?
Answer: Because it kept falling out.

Question: How can you tell if a blonde has been using your lawn mower?
Answer: The green “Welcome” mat is ripped all to shreds.

Question: A blonde and a brunette are tossed off a building, who hits the ground
first?
Answer: The brunette. The blonde has to stop to ask for directions.

Question: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimer’s disease?
Answer: Her IQ goes up!

Question: Why did the blonde have a sore navel?
Answer: Because her boyfriend was also blond!

Q. What do you call a blond upside-down?
A. A brunette

Q. Why cant a blonde make cool-aid?
A. She can’t fit 2 cups of water in the little packet.

Q. What did the blonde say when she woke up?
A. Who the hell are you!?!?!

Q. Why can’t blondes’ pass their driving tests?
A. They always jump in the back seat.

Question: What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet???
Answer: The winner of a Hide and Seek game.

Question: Did you hear about the blonde who lost 85% of her brains?
Answer: Her husband died.

Question: How does a blonde turn on the light in the morning?
Answer: Opens the car door.

Question: How come the blonde had a square chest?
Answer: She forgot to take the Kleenex out of the box.

Question: How do you change a blondes mind?
Answer: Blow in her ear.

Question: How do you drown a blonde?
Answer: Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool.

Question: How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree?
Answer: Wave.

Question: What does a blonde say after making love?
Answer: Thanks guys.

Question: What did the blonde say when the job interviewer asked her to spell her
name?
Answer: “H-E-R N-A-M-E.”

Question: What do you call 2 blondes in a freezer?
Answer: Frosted flakes.

Question: What is a blondes mating call?
Answer: Oh, I’m soooooo drunk!

Question: What do you call a blonde with 1/2 a brain?
Answer: Gifted.

Question: What do you call a brunette between 2 blondes?
Answer: An interpreter.

Question: What do you call a circle of blondes?
Answer: A dope ring.

Question: What do you have when there are three blondes in a corner?
Answer: An air pocket.

Question: Why do you take a blonde shopping with you?
Answer: To be able to park in the handicapped zone.

Question: What goes “VROOOM SCREECH! VROOOM SCREECH! VROOOM SCREECH!”
Answer: A blonde at a flashing red light!

Question: What happened to the blonde terrorist who tried to blow up a bus?
Answer: She burned her lips on the exhaust pipe.

Question: What is the difference between a young blonde and an old blonde?
Answer: A young one uses Vaseline; an old one uses Poli-Grip.

Question: Why did 18 blondes go to the R-rated movie?
Answer: Because they heard that under 17 was not admitted.

Question: Why do blondes like tilt steering?
Answer: More head room.

Question: Why do blondes write TGIF on their bras?
Answer: Tits Go In First

Question: Why do you keep a blonde on the job 7 days a week?
Answer: So you don’t have to retrain them on Monday.

Question: Why do blondes wear panties?
Answer: To keep their ankles warm.

Question: Why does a blonde eat beans on Saturday?
Answer: So she can take a bubble bath on Sunday.

Question: Why don’t blondes like pickles?
Answer: They keep getting their head stuck in the jar.

Question: How do you know a blonde’s been using your computer?
Answer: Lipstick on the joystick